“I’m gonna get wasted this weekend in LA,” shared the young mother traveling solo. She sat next to me at a bustling bar at the Boston airport, and had just ordered her third glass of Pinot Grigio.
“Oh, fun,” I hesitated, mentally ordering her three waters and putting an imaginary Tylenol on her napkin. I was totally projecting my own experiences with long flights and hangovers onto the young mom. Although I now imbibe on rare occasions, I still remember the morning after a glass or two too many of Pinot Grigio all too well.
But another kind of hangover has crept into my life this last decade or so. After my first experience with it my coach said, “Oh, you’ve got a vulnerability hangover.”
“A wha?” I asked.
“You did something big and vulnerable, so you’re feeling exposed. It’s a natural contraction,” she answered.
I hired this coach to help me prepare for my first keynote presentation. I’d thought after I’d succeeded with this task I’d feel relieved or maybe even elated! But instead I wanted to hibernate in a dark room with two Tylenol and a pot of herbal tea. I guess my coach was right: I was hungover without the Pinot Grigio.
I get this kind of hangover after vulnerable conversations, after trying out new jokes on the comedy stage, and after doing something new and stretchy at work. When snakes shed their skin as they grow, they also feel vulnerable and hide away. I imagine their new, bigger snake suit feels glossy and nice, but also tender.
I’m sharing this because these vulnerability hangovers still surprise me when they happen. “Shouldn’t I feel amazing? I did a new/hard/good thing!” I think to myself. “Why do I feel so crappy?!”
When a vulnerability hangover strikes me I try to be gentle with myself and remind myself that this kinda hangover means I’m growing. Lots of water and cozy blankets help, too. I’d rather have a vulnerability hangover than an old, too tight, dried out snake suit.
Do you get vulnerability hangovers, too? If so, how do you take care of you when they come your way?
If you’re looking to grow, shed some skin, and have groovy snakes to slither with (sorry, not sorry!) there’s still time to get in on the fun we’re having starting today and for the next six weeks in The Sandbox for Intuition Development + Creative Expression.
You can join one or more of the playshops, even if you’re not available for the whole 6-week series:
- Playshop 1: Creative You – Creativity as Your Essential Nature (Fri, Oct 6)
- Playshop 2: Creative Blocks – Healing the Creative Wounds (Fri, Oct 13)
- Playshop 3: Creative Nourishment – Practices that Support Your Creativity and Flow (Fri, Oct 20)
- Playshop 4: Creative Expression – Connecting with your Unique and Authentic Expression (Fri, Oct 27)
- Playshop 5: Creative Expansion -Coloring Outside of the Lines and Expanding Your Creative Range (Fri, Nov 3)
- Playshop 6: Creative Force of Nature – Creative cycles and the Magical Art of Completion (Fri, Nov 10)
Click on the link below to sign up for any of the Sandbox sessions you want to get in on:
https://www.newyorkminutes.org/sandbox/
When you register for a Playshop, you can hop into any of the Sandbox sessions as well to spend time creating in community.
By the way, the solo traveling mom ended up sitting a few rows in front of me on my flight back to LA last week. I noticed she took a nice long nap on the six hour trip, and I trust she had a lot of fun in LA and has fully recovered from any and all hangovers — vulnerability or otherwise. 🙂
I hope if you’re also feeling a bit tender, vulnerable, or stretchy these days you know that you’re experiencing new/hard/good things and you’re not alone. And if you’ve got a vulnerability hangover, hang in there and do what feels good to you in times of growth.
